There was a lot of talk about change and hope when a new president came in one of the nations of the world. He was advocating a policy against foreign workers. This call is getting picked up in many nations like Australia, UK..................
I was just going through wiki and saw some interesting dates.
First settlers went to US in 1607.
It is now 2009.
Hmmm about 402 years.................
So this 402 years give the right to say to no more immigration.
First Afro-americans went to US in 1619.
That gives the president a history of maximum 390 years.
So this 390 years give the right to say to no more immigration.
First settlers went to Australia in 1788.
It is now 2009.
Hmmm about 221 years.................
So this 221 years give the right to say to no more immigration.
These lands where taken away from the original occupants and are now occupied by settlers, who say 'NO' to new settlers and outside workers.
Now another interesting fact.
The British came to India in 1617.
They were there till 1947.
That is about 330 years.
So are not the British entitled to all the jobs in India, hmm,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,at least half ................ or ..................
Still I am confused..................
Wednesday 25 March 2009
Tuesday 24 March 2009
When I was in ..............
When I was in ............................, This was a phrase that was attributed to pensioners from armed forces always......They were the people who used to travel far and wide as part of their assignments. As part of their journeys they used to have very exciting adventures too, which they used to narrate to all those around them (whether they were interested or not ) ..........
But globalisation changed it all . Lately lot of people have started to travel abroad, first it was Gulf countries, then US, UK, Australia the list continues..Software engineers are a lot who are blessed with this travel luck..at least till this recession time.
So now they have taken over this phrase from the poor pensioners. Difference is when I was in Punjab, Jammu etc is now replaced with , when I was in US, UK .............
You can see a lot of RRI s walking around you. (Recently Returned Indians..) , please replace the I with your country, if someone outside India is reading this blog( writer hopes so). Now how can you recogonise them ? .........Hmm.......quite easy........first you will hear a lot of 'please' , 'thank you' ........They will hold the door open for the person behind..They tend to stand in perfect queue for lunch and in bus stop. Suddenly they will start to obey traffic rules and stop spitting in road....A fear of driving and crossing roads also can betray RRI s ......Forgot one thing.........will frequently complain about the heat....speed of net ..........pollution........corruption....
And a lot of 'When I was in ...............' or 'In ............. things are not done like this.........'.
Now this is a hangover that lasts only few weeks, or months depending on the time spent onsite. Days pass and RRI will become just RI - the Real Indian.......now no more 'please' or 'thanks', doors will bang shut,,,,,, lunch queues become like cinema theatre queues...I am referring to real theatre qs, not the multiplex ones....
What causes the change ?
My aim is not to compare a developed country and a developing country and say everything is bad.
But really, if you answer my question,
then in your answer the solution will be there.
to make the developing country , a developed one...........
So till then , when I was in .......................... :)
But globalisation changed it all . Lately lot of people have started to travel abroad, first it was Gulf countries, then US, UK, Australia the list continues..Software engineers are a lot who are blessed with this travel luck..at least till this recession time.
So now they have taken over this phrase from the poor pensioners. Difference is when I was in Punjab, Jammu etc is now replaced with , when I was in US, UK .............
You can see a lot of RRI s walking around you. (Recently Returned Indians..) , please replace the I with your country, if someone outside India is reading this blog( writer hopes so). Now how can you recogonise them ? .........Hmm.......quite easy........first you will hear a lot of 'please' , 'thank you' ........They will hold the door open for the person behind..They tend to stand in perfect queue for lunch and in bus stop. Suddenly they will start to obey traffic rules and stop spitting in road....A fear of driving and crossing roads also can betray RRI s ......Forgot one thing.........will frequently complain about the heat....speed of net ..........pollution........corruption....
And a lot of 'When I was in ...............' or 'In ............. things are not done like this.........'.
Now this is a hangover that lasts only few weeks, or months depending on the time spent onsite. Days pass and RRI will become just RI - the Real Indian.......now no more 'please' or 'thanks', doors will bang shut,,,,,, lunch queues become like cinema theatre queues...I am referring to real theatre qs, not the multiplex ones....
What causes the change ?
My aim is not to compare a developed country and a developing country and say everything is bad.
But really, if you answer my question,
then in your answer the solution will be there.
to make the developing country , a developed one...........
So till then , when I was in .......................... :)
Tuesday 17 March 2009
The dog ate your news
Back when we were in school, the lamest excuse we could give for not doing homework was something like , "The dog ate my homework". :). Reading through newspapers, I feel like they are telling me the same................"We are sorry, the dog ate your news, but do not worry, what was left, we have got for you"..
All of us like to get the news in the morning, news papers, news channels , internet sites or e-papers; the mode just varies, the thirst for news is always there. We discuss, we speculate, we share and live an enlightened life.
But ask yourselves
1. Am I getting the news ?
2. Am I reading just what I like ?
3. Am I forced to read the CREATED news?
Confused................ Ok.to understand the relevance of these questions, just take a relevant issue and read about it 3 - 4 different news-papers. You will find some have ommited it (Question 1), you may find attracted to a particular newspaper (Question 2), it has been reported in a totally false manner (Question 3).
Remember the famous or infamous Bush shoe throwing....................
1. It was reported as an incident which happened in a press briefing, journalist throwing shoe at a visiting foreign president.
2. Some went one more step , linked it to Afghan and Iraq wars. Quite OK, a bit of truth....
3. One more step, it was linked to Muslim customs and projected as an ultimate insult. Here the paper is threading on a thin line between news and favoritism.
4. One more step, papers say the shoe could only be thrown as Iraqis got freedom.
5. One more step, papers praise Bush's athleticism..............now more like propoganda...........
Now read the questions again .........................does it make sense ?
There is a dangerous trend in here. The second question addresses that. The news from both sides are there. Yet the reader wants to ignore the other side. There ends the value of fraternity and co-existence and starts an era of neo-nazism (or communalism).
There is also a less dangerous trend in this division - the tabloids. People may want to read a more dramatised version of events. Here the newspaper is not the culprit. It exists as the people want to read it that way. A pinch of the masala to the dull life. What more than a center spread to start the day energetically :)
Investigative journalism changes way for sensationalism. Papers present contradictory news each day and blames the different parties for falsifying info. But these papers who present these news to us, do not they have a duty to verify things ............
I remember a heading from BBC site, Indian police recruits rats................. A person stopping at this heading gets the feeling, ya Indians ............snake charmers, may do more than this....But the news under says and ingenious way of using pet albino rats to keep away the other dangerous pests. Now if this same thing was done in UK, what would have been the heading ?................. This is really amusing.
So guys, read the news left after the dog ate it .................. or read at least from 2 opposing news papers and get the actual picture. It will definitely be somewhere in between what they have reported..............
All of us like to get the news in the morning, news papers, news channels , internet sites or e-papers; the mode just varies, the thirst for news is always there. We discuss, we speculate, we share and live an enlightened life.
But ask yourselves
1. Am I getting the news ?
2. Am I reading just what I like ?
3. Am I forced to read the CREATED news?
Confused................ Ok.to understand the relevance of these questions, just take a relevant issue and read about it 3 - 4 different news-papers. You will find some have ommited it (Question 1), you may find attracted to a particular newspaper (Question 2), it has been reported in a totally false manner (Question 3).
Remember the famous or infamous Bush shoe throwing....................
1. It was reported as an incident which happened in a press briefing, journalist throwing shoe at a visiting foreign president.
2. Some went one more step , linked it to Afghan and Iraq wars. Quite OK, a bit of truth....
3. One more step, it was linked to Muslim customs and projected as an ultimate insult. Here the paper is threading on a thin line between news and favoritism.
4. One more step, papers say the shoe could only be thrown as Iraqis got freedom.
5. One more step, papers praise Bush's athleticism..............now more like propoganda...........
Now read the questions again .........................does it make sense ?
There is a dangerous trend in here. The second question addresses that. The news from both sides are there. Yet the reader wants to ignore the other side. There ends the value of fraternity and co-existence and starts an era of neo-nazism (or communalism).
There is also a less dangerous trend in this division - the tabloids. People may want to read a more dramatised version of events. Here the newspaper is not the culprit. It exists as the people want to read it that way. A pinch of the masala to the dull life. What more than a center spread to start the day energetically :)
Investigative journalism changes way for sensationalism. Papers present contradictory news each day and blames the different parties for falsifying info. But these papers who present these news to us, do not they have a duty to verify things ............
I remember a heading from BBC site, Indian police recruits rats................. A person stopping at this heading gets the feeling, ya Indians ............snake charmers, may do more than this....But the news under says and ingenious way of using pet albino rats to keep away the other dangerous pests. Now if this same thing was done in UK, what would have been the heading ?................. This is really amusing.
So guys, read the news left after the dog ate it .................. or read at least from 2 opposing news papers and get the actual picture. It will definitely be somewhere in between what they have reported..............
Thursday 12 March 2009
Why India should shift to football from cricket ?
Team India (not Indian team, they are staying independent of the country, but needs the same nationalism), is doing well in cricket. Has got a series win also in New Zealand after a very long time. So why I am asking India to shift to football from crciket, when we are almost at the top of the world in cricket (do not ask me how many countries play cricket ? max 12 and how many decent teams in that 12, may be 4, 5........Hurray we are almost at the top of a sport played by 4, 5 countries).
It may be blasphemy for an Indian to think twice about cricket, where crciket is a religion and Sachin is a God. But seriously why do we like cricket ? Is it for the right reasons ?
1. for strategy ?
2. for planning ?
3. for concentration ?
4. for skill ?
5. as a time killer ?
6. for all the glamour ?
7. as a good means of exercise ?
8. just for the excitement ?
Ya, you can give me the answer ............... A thing close to heart does not need a reason to be liked .......... true........... I agree................. but here we are talking about a sport........... not our beloved ............. so please answer me ..
If you give any of the first 4 as reasons, rigtht reasons, but at the wrong game.
Ya actually when you play crcket in proper format all 4 are there... but mostly we play in a ad-hoc manner. Do you get to put any strategy in place ? In TV when do you get to see a strategy unfolding ? Do you get to see what s happening on ground ? Correct me if I am wrong, a lot happens in between overs. Have you seen it anytime ? The switches in fielding, discussions..anything ? You are lucky if you get to see the first and last balls in the overs....You do not decide what you decide to see ..........Broadcasters decide it .............
Time killer , glamour ya at the right place. excitement ................please change at least to 20-20 from test cricket. At least you get what you wanted.
Exercise, as the reason.................ha ha....................when was the last time you played cricket.........when was the last time you got some exercise playing cricket ? Stood for 30 minutes in ground.................true...........considering sitting in front of tv for long hours ......... standing 30 minutes is great exercise.... I have to agree.
The amount of productive man hours robbed by crciket is unimaginable. Hours gone.........mass leaves.............mass cuts...............usage of electricity..............usage of net...............usage of company resources....................by the sheer length of time alone, this game is not suited for modern lives.
If you play it regularily, you are at least pardoned, but if you spennt the whole day in front of tele, watching it , even a one day is 6 hours, with a bowl of chips what excuse do you have ? It is a recipe for health disaster.
By nature we may be liking it, the one man show, instant ride to glory, mind games, but really it is not much of a team game.
About Indian being top of game, no not worth it, we are sacrificing all other options for a game played by 4 5 decent countries. When Bhaji got the Bushan, we disgraced the olympic medal holders.
Another reason is the ads too. Corporates liove it. The amount of mind washing and conditioning done through the ads in between over is enormous. When you expose a little one to cricket in TV, mind you, it is not really to game you introduce, but to a world of filthy consumer world. (If you drink a bottle of cola you are cool, if you get a perfume, you are macho). The ads are there always in TV, yes I agree, but when will you get to exposed to them, like when you watch cricket ? Even infamous serials have a ratio of 50:50 max I think. Now on top of that even run up results in a small screen, shared along with ads. If you are thinking they are advertising, what is the big deal ......... understand the money does go from what you pay...........in fact you are paying more for a product for these ads.
May be in Europe where they get less sun, this may be way to get some essentail vitamin D. But doing that in India, you will only get sun burns.................tests ............. 5 days in Indian sun.............People in gallery too..................hmmm.............are we seriously mad ?
Fitness levels of professional players .............. that is worst in cricket...............so what to say about the amateurs ................. people tend to avoid fielding all together, where they will get to do some running at least.
The amount of gear needed to play cricket at least at a decent level, is not affordable to Indian public. It is not a quest that many can follow, so at grass roots it become worse..... so do not think every cricketer s life is a phenomenonal rise which inspires Indians. They are all from wealthy families or at least from higher middle class.
And the betting, the betting on cricket is not legal in India. So it is taken over by the underworld. Mostly this money comes back to fund terrorism in India. Enormous pressure comes on players to fix matches.
The fitness tests for students in Kerala , a southern state in India as part of curriculum, has showed disastorous results..............
Hmm,,,,,,,,,,,,, think about it.............. 1 or 1 and a 1/2 hours of football, what it can do to you........
1. fitness
2. some team work.
3. less ads.
4. more productive man hours.
5. affordable game for public.
........................if they are the right reasons for you, switch............... or if you do not want at least follow crciket for the right reasons..................
It may be blasphemy for an Indian to think twice about cricket, where crciket is a religion and Sachin is a God. But seriously why do we like cricket ? Is it for the right reasons ?
1. for strategy ?
2. for planning ?
3. for concentration ?
4. for skill ?
5. as a time killer ?
6. for all the glamour ?
7. as a good means of exercise ?
8. just for the excitement ?
Ya, you can give me the answer ............... A thing close to heart does not need a reason to be liked .......... true........... I agree................. but here we are talking about a sport........... not our beloved ............. so please answer me ..
If you give any of the first 4 as reasons, rigtht reasons, but at the wrong game.
Ya actually when you play crcket in proper format all 4 are there... but mostly we play in a ad-hoc manner. Do you get to put any strategy in place ? In TV when do you get to see a strategy unfolding ? Do you get to see what s happening on ground ? Correct me if I am wrong, a lot happens in between overs. Have you seen it anytime ? The switches in fielding, discussions..anything ? You are lucky if you get to see the first and last balls in the overs....You do not decide what you decide to see ..........Broadcasters decide it .............
Time killer , glamour ya at the right place. excitement ................please change at least to 20-20 from test cricket. At least you get what you wanted.
Exercise, as the reason.................ha ha....................when was the last time you played cricket.........when was the last time you got some exercise playing cricket ? Stood for 30 minutes in ground.................true...........considering sitting in front of tv for long hours ......... standing 30 minutes is great exercise.... I have to agree.
The amount of productive man hours robbed by crciket is unimaginable. Hours gone.........mass leaves.............mass cuts...............usage of electricity..............usage of net...............usage of company resources....................by the sheer length of time alone, this game is not suited for modern lives.
If you play it regularily, you are at least pardoned, but if you spennt the whole day in front of tele, watching it , even a one day is 6 hours, with a bowl of chips what excuse do you have ? It is a recipe for health disaster.
By nature we may be liking it, the one man show, instant ride to glory, mind games, but really it is not much of a team game.
About Indian being top of game, no not worth it, we are sacrificing all other options for a game played by 4 5 decent countries. When Bhaji got the Bushan, we disgraced the olympic medal holders.
Another reason is the ads too. Corporates liove it. The amount of mind washing and conditioning done through the ads in between over is enormous. When you expose a little one to cricket in TV, mind you, it is not really to game you introduce, but to a world of filthy consumer world. (If you drink a bottle of cola you are cool, if you get a perfume, you are macho). The ads are there always in TV, yes I agree, but when will you get to exposed to them, like when you watch cricket ? Even infamous serials have a ratio of 50:50 max I think. Now on top of that even run up results in a small screen, shared along with ads. If you are thinking they are advertising, what is the big deal ......... understand the money does go from what you pay...........in fact you are paying more for a product for these ads.
May be in Europe where they get less sun, this may be way to get some essentail vitamin D. But doing that in India, you will only get sun burns.................tests ............. 5 days in Indian sun.............People in gallery too..................hmmm.............are we seriously mad ?
Fitness levels of professional players .............. that is worst in cricket...............so what to say about the amateurs ................. people tend to avoid fielding all together, where they will get to do some running at least.
The amount of gear needed to play cricket at least at a decent level, is not affordable to Indian public. It is not a quest that many can follow, so at grass roots it become worse..... so do not think every cricketer s life is a phenomenonal rise which inspires Indians. They are all from wealthy families or at least from higher middle class.
And the betting, the betting on cricket is not legal in India. So it is taken over by the underworld. Mostly this money comes back to fund terrorism in India. Enormous pressure comes on players to fix matches.
The fitness tests for students in Kerala , a southern state in India as part of curriculum, has showed disastorous results..............
Hmm,,,,,,,,,,,,, think about it.............. 1 or 1 and a 1/2 hours of football, what it can do to you........
1. fitness
2. some team work.
3. less ads.
4. more productive man hours.
5. affordable game for public.
........................if they are the right reasons for you, switch............... or if you do not want at least follow crciket for the right reasons..................
Tuesday 10 March 2009
The watchman and the robot
Once upon a time there was an ATM. There was also a watchman who stood guard to the ATM. The bank owners saw this watch man as an old fashioned accessory, even though he was doing his duties correctly. They wanted to modernise themselves. They wanted a new robot to guard the ATM.
Bank board met, they approved of the decision. Yes , a robot, that is the solution to everything, a reprogrammable robot, that is versatile, who can speak all languages.
They contacted a reputed company to construct the robot. Now domain experts came - retired thieves who used to rob ATMs. Workshops started. Workshops progressed well. Rather than a big bang approach, they opted for a transition.
How you will do a smooth transition. After hours of brain storming, the company found out a way. Divide the project into 3 parallel streams. Version 1100 - which is the watchman. Version 1200 - dress up the policeman as a robot. Version 1300 - Actual robot. All will proceed parallely.
In version 1100, people will work on the attire of watchman, will try to make it attractive. In version 1200, a masquerade of robot will be put over this attractive dress, in 1300, the all powerful robot will replace the masqueraded watchman.
Everybody was happy.
Version 1100 was a success, watchman became, more attractive. His costumes were a hit. But he could not run after the crooks with this dress. So the technology company sent 2 of its operatives to the ATM. They started to run after the crooks. Now 3 people were monitoring the ATM, yet an occasional crook came and took cash.
Everybody was waiting for V1200 to make things good. The masquearde arrived. Now the watchman was dressed up as robot. He became even slow. Now company increased 2 men to 5.
now 6 were trying to catch the crooks now.
Hmm , now version 1300 was really needed, it was rushed, and the robot came. It could nt run, it would nt let customers into ATM and more over it handed over cash to crooks.
Robot was quickly rolled back, masqueraded watch man was back.
But do not worry, version 1400 is in design, for teaching the masqueraded watchman robot dance.
:)
Bank board met, they approved of the decision. Yes , a robot, that is the solution to everything, a reprogrammable robot, that is versatile, who can speak all languages.
They contacted a reputed company to construct the robot. Now domain experts came - retired thieves who used to rob ATMs. Workshops started. Workshops progressed well. Rather than a big bang approach, they opted for a transition.
How you will do a smooth transition. After hours of brain storming, the company found out a way. Divide the project into 3 parallel streams. Version 1100 - which is the watchman. Version 1200 - dress up the policeman as a robot. Version 1300 - Actual robot. All will proceed parallely.
In version 1100, people will work on the attire of watchman, will try to make it attractive. In version 1200, a masquerade of robot will be put over this attractive dress, in 1300, the all powerful robot will replace the masqueraded watchman.
Everybody was happy.
Version 1100 was a success, watchman became, more attractive. His costumes were a hit. But he could not run after the crooks with this dress. So the technology company sent 2 of its operatives to the ATM. They started to run after the crooks. Now 3 people were monitoring the ATM, yet an occasional crook came and took cash.
Everybody was waiting for V1200 to make things good. The masquearde arrived. Now the watchman was dressed up as robot. He became even slow. Now company increased 2 men to 5.
now 6 were trying to catch the crooks now.
Hmm , now version 1300 was really needed, it was rushed, and the robot came. It could nt run, it would nt let customers into ATM and more over it handed over cash to crooks.
Robot was quickly rolled back, masqueraded watch man was back.
But do not worry, version 1400 is in design, for teaching the masqueraded watchman robot dance.
:)
We are the software engineers
Hey I am also a software engineer.
Do you know me ? Hmm ............. to tell about me, I do not know much coding. Somehow I have to survive. I am working in maintenance, so not much coding will come. Hmm........ if it comes, I have a way out. I start to ask doubts to someone who knows a bit of coding. My doubts become so persistent that, at last, he will sit and code and go. When asking doubts I am very careful. If manager comes, I start to explain things to the poor guy in loud voice. I never sit down also. Standing gives a feeling of superiority, and people think I am in a hurry to work :) Ha ha I am also a software engineer.................
Hey I too am a software engineer. I specialises in forwarding messages, both personal and official. Personal mails are forwarded to mail groups, ya gives me visibility. Official mails, I take contents from my team members' mails and write mails to managers. Credit to team member .......... hmm .....no way, information is free, anything in my inbox becomes mine........... I am also a software engineer.
Hmm... I also am a software engineer..........I specialises in consolidation and sharing. I do not do independent work. I am too great for that. I divide work, make others do it, consolidate results, make the work mine. My machine is always free for sharing. Anybody can put excel sheets in my shared folder. But mind you, I will consolidate them. Ya, I too am a software engineer.
Hey I am also a software engineer, I always complaint that I want to do technical work. It is a secret that my team lead had long back recogonised that I can not code anything and has put me in documentation. But I have to put it to my advantage . So I tell all that I am taking the hard part of documentation so that others can do the easy work , the code. But reguralarily I will complaint in team meetings that I want to code. Ya, why can nt I, I am also a software engineer.
Hey I am also a software enginner, a perpetual moaner, I always complaint that my hands are full. I say I do all the work in the team. According to me all others are free, only I am working. I will ask anyone questions at anytime, I want the answer then and there. But when they come to me, I m as usual busy. Five things to finish before I go home today, if at all I go home. Basically I do not get anything done. I know how to make others think I am busy. I always make things complex and difficult. Always there are dependencies. :) Ya mee too, ya ya , software engineer.
Hey I am the beautiful software engineer. I am too soft, I am too beautiful too. Nobody will allow me to do any work. As soon as I get something to do, some one will come running and do the work. I just need to smile and make occasional praises. Ya an accasional lunch and tea also I have to suffer. Even client meetings I just go, sit there and smile. I too soffffffffffffftttttttttttttttware engineer.
Ya I am also SWPR engineer. SWPR ........... Software Public Relations............ ya ya ........... you got me........I organise outings, group activities... etc etc. Software, ya I make databases for collecting information about T Shirt sizes. But mind you, I am always top rater, because I work across teams.......... ya SWPR engineer.
Ya I am the software enginner specialising in tea and cigarettes . Morning I have one tea and cigarette (not only men) . Ya by the time I finish it wil be lunch, I go for lunch finish it, oh my ..., again tea time, have a tea,, time to go home,,,,,,,,,,,, I am also a softie. A pinch of gossip and ogling makes tea time productive.
I am serious software engineer, I do things seroiusly , provided it has nothing to do with my actual work. I trade, I sell , I buy,...................... everything very seriously.............. ya ya very very serious software engineer.
I am Man in the Middle software engineer. I basically do not mind my own business. Like some one said, anywhere there are 2 people, I will be with them. I will give expert comments on anything. I will make others look foolish. If others are talking to their managers, about their hardship also, I will interfere and make them understand that this is the best company and best salary they can get. Then I will goto meeting room and ask for my hike................. me too engineer, ya, software engineer.
I am a software engineer, I like drawing boards. Anything happens, I start to draw figures and lines. I call meeting in morning, afternoon and evenings. Software engineering , it is simple, it is all in design, it is all in my figures. Do not ask why I can not draw a rectangle properly. It is modern art. ...........:) Ya I am also a software engineer.
Me, I am browsing software engineer. Even though I work in my company, I am contracted to check the efficiency of IE and Firefox. I take up load testing, performance testing, exclusively for IE and Firefox.
I am software engineer, but a particular breed, I do only my job, I am well aware of my job boundaries. I am an expert in making anything, others work. I do the work of a mail server, I redirect all requests to correct parties. I will never learn a new technology. I am an domain expert also.
Hmm I am biggest software guy. I am QUALITY. I am not concerned about the quality of actual deliverable, because I do not know anything about coding. But when audit comes I become a superstar. I start to reverse engineer documents. I make 'lookahead' meetings in past. I fabricate risk analysis. The code will never goto production. But I , my project and company are all certified......................
Ya guys , we are the software engineers.
May look a bit cynical, but next time look around and classify ............ you will be surprised how this matches.
Do you know me ? Hmm ............. to tell about me, I do not know much coding. Somehow I have to survive. I am working in maintenance, so not much coding will come. Hmm........ if it comes, I have a way out. I start to ask doubts to someone who knows a bit of coding. My doubts become so persistent that, at last, he will sit and code and go. When asking doubts I am very careful. If manager comes, I start to explain things to the poor guy in loud voice. I never sit down also. Standing gives a feeling of superiority, and people think I am in a hurry to work :) Ha ha I am also a software engineer.................
Hey I too am a software engineer. I specialises in forwarding messages, both personal and official. Personal mails are forwarded to mail groups, ya gives me visibility. Official mails, I take contents from my team members' mails and write mails to managers. Credit to team member .......... hmm .....no way, information is free, anything in my inbox becomes mine........... I am also a software engineer.
Hmm... I also am a software engineer..........I specialises in consolidation and sharing. I do not do independent work. I am too great for that. I divide work, make others do it, consolidate results, make the work mine. My machine is always free for sharing. Anybody can put excel sheets in my shared folder. But mind you, I will consolidate them. Ya, I too am a software engineer.
Hey I am also a software engineer, I always complaint that I want to do technical work. It is a secret that my team lead had long back recogonised that I can not code anything and has put me in documentation. But I have to put it to my advantage . So I tell all that I am taking the hard part of documentation so that others can do the easy work , the code. But reguralarily I will complaint in team meetings that I want to code. Ya, why can nt I, I am also a software engineer.
Hey I am also a software enginner, a perpetual moaner, I always complaint that my hands are full. I say I do all the work in the team. According to me all others are free, only I am working. I will ask anyone questions at anytime, I want the answer then and there. But when they come to me, I m as usual busy. Five things to finish before I go home today, if at all I go home. Basically I do not get anything done. I know how to make others think I am busy. I always make things complex and difficult. Always there are dependencies. :) Ya mee too, ya ya , software engineer.
Hey I am the beautiful software engineer. I am too soft, I am too beautiful too. Nobody will allow me to do any work. As soon as I get something to do, some one will come running and do the work. I just need to smile and make occasional praises. Ya an accasional lunch and tea also I have to suffer. Even client meetings I just go, sit there and smile. I too soffffffffffffftttttttttttttttware engineer.
Ya I am also SWPR engineer. SWPR ........... Software Public Relations............ ya ya ........... you got me........I organise outings, group activities... etc etc. Software, ya I make databases for collecting information about T Shirt sizes. But mind you, I am always top rater, because I work across teams.......... ya SWPR engineer.
Ya I am the software enginner specialising in tea and cigarettes . Morning I have one tea and cigarette (not only men) . Ya by the time I finish it wil be lunch, I go for lunch finish it, oh my ..., again tea time, have a tea,, time to go home,,,,,,,,,,,, I am also a softie. A pinch of gossip and ogling makes tea time productive.
I am serious software engineer, I do things seroiusly , provided it has nothing to do with my actual work. I trade, I sell , I buy,...................... everything very seriously.............. ya ya very very serious software engineer.
I am Man in the Middle software engineer. I basically do not mind my own business. Like some one said, anywhere there are 2 people, I will be with them. I will give expert comments on anything. I will make others look foolish. If others are talking to their managers, about their hardship also, I will interfere and make them understand that this is the best company and best salary they can get. Then I will goto meeting room and ask for my hike................. me too engineer, ya, software engineer.
I am a software engineer, I like drawing boards. Anything happens, I start to draw figures and lines. I call meeting in morning, afternoon and evenings. Software engineering , it is simple, it is all in design, it is all in my figures. Do not ask why I can not draw a rectangle properly. It is modern art. ...........:) Ya I am also a software engineer.
Me, I am browsing software engineer. Even though I work in my company, I am contracted to check the efficiency of IE and Firefox. I take up load testing, performance testing, exclusively for IE and Firefox.
I am software engineer, but a particular breed, I do only my job, I am well aware of my job boundaries. I am an expert in making anything, others work. I do the work of a mail server, I redirect all requests to correct parties. I will never learn a new technology. I am an domain expert also.
Hmm I am biggest software guy. I am QUALITY. I am not concerned about the quality of actual deliverable, because I do not know anything about coding. But when audit comes I become a superstar. I start to reverse engineer documents. I make 'lookahead' meetings in past. I fabricate risk analysis. The code will never goto production. But I , my project and company are all certified......................
Ya guys , we are the software engineers.
May look a bit cynical, but next time look around and classify ............ you will be surprised how this matches.
Monday 9 March 2009
Interactive white boards
This is something that I came to see for the first time when I came to UK this time. In fact the company in which I work manufactures them.
The concept is pretty simple, Anything you can do on a computer, you can do on an interactive white board. I saw the board in action, and it literally surprised me.
It consists of a white board, a projector and an electronic pen to write on the board and click on the contents on the board.
You can design games which students can play, can have interactive lessons, 3d animations of lessons, videos and all the great advantages that a computer can offer. It makes the classroom lively.
It may not be a new thing for the schools in UK, but it will be certainly a surprise for Indian schools.
It does not even confine itself to schools, it can find application in corporate world too.
A computer and a projector to project it onto white screen is not new to the corporate world in India. But to interactively do something on the content projected, the presentator has to again go back to the computer. I mean it is a one way communication from the computer to the projected image. But in case of the interactive board it s 2 way communication. You need not go back to the confined computer screen to change screens or highlight things or make notes. Remeber people using a marker and getting the projection screen dirty. Many a time people use permanant markers too to make things worse. So a circle meant for a slide remains for all the presentations to come.
Gone are those days.
Its price may be a bit high - around 63 K. But I think our universities and the private schools can definitely afford these.
And also the corporate meeting rooms.
See it to believe how good it is. Have quite a number of demos also in net.
The concept is pretty simple, Anything you can do on a computer, you can do on an interactive white board. I saw the board in action, and it literally surprised me.
It consists of a white board, a projector and an electronic pen to write on the board and click on the contents on the board.
You can design games which students can play, can have interactive lessons, 3d animations of lessons, videos and all the great advantages that a computer can offer. It makes the classroom lively.
It may not be a new thing for the schools in UK, but it will be certainly a surprise for Indian schools.
It does not even confine itself to schools, it can find application in corporate world too.
A computer and a projector to project it onto white screen is not new to the corporate world in India. But to interactively do something on the content projected, the presentator has to again go back to the computer. I mean it is a one way communication from the computer to the projected image. But in case of the interactive board it s 2 way communication. You need not go back to the confined computer screen to change screens or highlight things or make notes. Remeber people using a marker and getting the projection screen dirty. Many a time people use permanant markers too to make things worse. So a circle meant for a slide remains for all the presentations to come.
Gone are those days.
Its price may be a bit high - around 63 K. But I think our universities and the private schools can definitely afford these.
And also the corporate meeting rooms.
See it to believe how good it is. Have quite a number of demos also in net.
Saturday 7 March 2009
How safe are our skies ?
I was seeing an episode of the air crash investigation in National Geographic. Somehow a disturbing thought was coming to my mind.
The points I got from the series were, aircrafts are very sophisticated machines built on failproof mechanisms. There are hundreds of small components in this aircarft which make us fly through the sky and they have been engineered to perfection. Also most of the systems are redundant - to make them fail-proof, means, a single component failing can not cause an accident. So far so good. I was happy.
After that certain points caught my attention. About 70% of the accidents are caused by personnel errors - made by people. Some of the components really depend on proper inspection, maintentance and replacement, rather than redundancy to be fail-proof.
Are you wondering where am I going with this? Giving a transcript of tv series or showing you I see National Geographic.
Really no. Most of the components have a stipulated service and replacement period.
The above points I mentioned becomes very important in time of recession - Personnel error and maintenance. We have been seeing many offers of cheap tickets. This may have been possible when the boom was there. But what about now ? How will the industry cope with the pressure - particularily in developing countries ? Develped countries may have many watch-dogs for industry standards and regulations.
Like any industry, the airline industry can also take steps to see off recession. Decreasing staff, Increasing the work load, increasing the uasge frequence of a carrier, therby decreasing the maintenance time and frequency. Replacement of components can be delayed. Faulty components which should be replaced may be left behind for the next maintenance period, as more maintenance time , means more time off the air.
This may or may not be happening, but this was a thought that came to my mind.
Really do not want my fears to be true.
Hmm............how safe are our skies through this recession period ?
The points I got from the series were, aircrafts are very sophisticated machines built on failproof mechanisms. There are hundreds of small components in this aircarft which make us fly through the sky and they have been engineered to perfection. Also most of the systems are redundant - to make them fail-proof, means, a single component failing can not cause an accident. So far so good. I was happy.
After that certain points caught my attention. About 70% of the accidents are caused by personnel errors - made by people. Some of the components really depend on proper inspection, maintentance and replacement, rather than redundancy to be fail-proof.
Are you wondering where am I going with this? Giving a transcript of tv series or showing you I see National Geographic.
Really no. Most of the components have a stipulated service and replacement period.
The above points I mentioned becomes very important in time of recession - Personnel error and maintenance. We have been seeing many offers of cheap tickets. This may have been possible when the boom was there. But what about now ? How will the industry cope with the pressure - particularily in developing countries ? Develped countries may have many watch-dogs for industry standards and regulations.
Like any industry, the airline industry can also take steps to see off recession. Decreasing staff, Increasing the work load, increasing the uasge frequence of a carrier, therby decreasing the maintenance time and frequency. Replacement of components can be delayed. Faulty components which should be replaced may be left behind for the next maintenance period, as more maintenance time , means more time off the air.
This may or may not be happening, but this was a thought that came to my mind.
Really do not want my fears to be true.
Hmm............how safe are our skies through this recession period ?
Friday 6 March 2009
Ways of robbing common man
All through human history, there were daring robberies. - armed robberies , which was basically confrontational. But with development of technology, these became irrational. Try robbing a store, you are bound to be in jail. But still robberies go on, who tries these insane ones ? People who do not have enough to eat, who are so desperate in life that they will try anything to live. People who are driven to the edge by society.
Banks have always been a good target. Many a film have come out, where you see people all dressed up in balck going for the loot with cutters. Ha ha, what are you going to do with the marked notes if you succed also ? Hmm..... films are not concerned about the life after robbery..Once the mission accomplished, their job is finsihed.
So where are all the smart crooks ? The ones who have been successful throughout in robbing common man. Have these technological advances and sophistication put an end to crime ? If you think so you are gravely mistaken.
Now it is safe to be on top of the bank and loot it, rather than outside. Better what, you will also get a large pension for your robbery. Hmm........... jail for robbery? no no , that is for common man robbing a common man. Here is an extra special, robbing common men, so no jail for him. In fact we have to double the pension for him to thank him for the job he has done for the economies of the world.
Welcome to the world of white collar crime, where you will not get punished. Now scenario had changed, but has our laws caught up ? No. We can not do anything to these guys. Now people specialise in killing common men not using guns, but driving them to their death in desperation and unemployment.
Welcome to the world of shares. Collect money from common man giving him all promises. He is always greedy, whatever you do to him, he will come back and buy them. Even if he is cheated in front of his eyes. Asatyam computers may be one example. The collected money you deposit in your various other companies and fiinally confess you had cooked up all books. Be sure to give politicians money. One important thing. When you do these new robberies, you do not take political sides. Both ruling and opposition should be in your pocket. You should help both campaigns.
Always have a good doctor handy. The moment some thing goes wrong, you are supposed to have chest pain. Five star prison, you deserve it, after all this clever looting.
If you are a politician, you can loot from anywhere. People have mastered it so well, I do not have any comments to make. When you are exposed, take out a procession with all your followers. Blame everyone other than you.
Hmm ....... are these the only ways? There is still a new way. Try to establish democarcy in another country. This you can try out only if you have enough fire power. Now to establish democarcy, you need to first destroy everything in that country. Now to rebuild it, take money as tax, from common men. Now be sure that all contracts go to your companies. Put some oil into the mix, and be on the director board of an oil company, you are in perfect position to rob common man.
Who said crime does not pay ? That person did not know how to do it :)
Banks have always been a good target. Many a film have come out, where you see people all dressed up in balck going for the loot with cutters. Ha ha, what are you going to do with the marked notes if you succed also ? Hmm..... films are not concerned about the life after robbery..Once the mission accomplished, their job is finsihed.
So where are all the smart crooks ? The ones who have been successful throughout in robbing common man. Have these technological advances and sophistication put an end to crime ? If you think so you are gravely mistaken.
Now it is safe to be on top of the bank and loot it, rather than outside. Better what, you will also get a large pension for your robbery. Hmm........... jail for robbery? no no , that is for common man robbing a common man. Here is an extra special, robbing common men, so no jail for him. In fact we have to double the pension for him to thank him for the job he has done for the economies of the world.
Welcome to the world of white collar crime, where you will not get punished. Now scenario had changed, but has our laws caught up ? No. We can not do anything to these guys. Now people specialise in killing common men not using guns, but driving them to their death in desperation and unemployment.
Welcome to the world of shares. Collect money from common man giving him all promises. He is always greedy, whatever you do to him, he will come back and buy them. Even if he is cheated in front of his eyes. Asatyam computers may be one example. The collected money you deposit in your various other companies and fiinally confess you had cooked up all books. Be sure to give politicians money. One important thing. When you do these new robberies, you do not take political sides. Both ruling and opposition should be in your pocket. You should help both campaigns.
Always have a good doctor handy. The moment some thing goes wrong, you are supposed to have chest pain. Five star prison, you deserve it, after all this clever looting.
If you are a politician, you can loot from anywhere. People have mastered it so well, I do not have any comments to make. When you are exposed, take out a procession with all your followers. Blame everyone other than you.
Hmm ....... are these the only ways? There is still a new way. Try to establish democarcy in another country. This you can try out only if you have enough fire power. Now to establish democarcy, you need to first destroy everything in that country. Now to rebuild it, take money as tax, from common men. Now be sure that all contracts go to your companies. Put some oil into the mix, and be on the director board of an oil company, you are in perfect position to rob common man.
Who said crime does not pay ? That person did not know how to do it :)
Thursday 5 March 2009
Religion and science
Thanks for all who read my first post and gave comments. I will try to write a post based on your comments. But a topic on TV caught my attention, and thought will write about it.
World is celebrating the theory of evolution, its 150 th year.
All religions have their stories of creation, so how will they handle this? Does it tell that their faith is wrong, or can they accept the theory of evolution and still keep their faith.
Based on this, a TV presenator was questioning a religious person about the changes happening in religion. The question was based on the changes made in religion to accept discoveries that science bring forward. He was on the assumption that religion drastically reinvents themselves to be on par with scientific advance.
The questions he raised also made me think some points.
1. Do religions reinvent themselves ?
Yes, they do. They try to incorporate changes in society and technology into them.
2. Is this right?
Yes. They have to. If it is to keep up the moral aspect of people, it has to address the modern issues. When you live in a world of internet, you can not talk in terms of early civilization customs. But when this happens, be sure to do it in a proper way that does not turn up absurd. But the problem here is people can believe you are controlled by machines in a matrix, cloned by extra terrestials, but disbelieve that God created you. But why ? This is because we some times present before them things which can not be scientifically correct, and the reluctance to change when proved wrong. Rememeber the earth-centric theory.
3.Why this happens?
This may be because of the authorities and politics that enter religion. When religion moves away from real faith , and moves into a power struggle the world suffers, also the followers. Religions based on almost same faiths fight against each other. I have seen Indians and Pakistanis so friendly outside Asia. But the politicians want to keep them against each other so that they have a topic they can turn always to win elections. Is the same true in case of religious leaders ? Remember a leader who used to do the Moses stuff lately quoting words from God. I think the reluctance to change in religion comes from power struggles and unhealthy politics. Noway you can justify when you bless and send people to die. It is your brother against whom you are going to fight against. So it is unquestioning faith that is asked for here. But the unquestioning faith which should be directed towards God is demanded by mortal men. It is as good as keeping people illetrate. Religion has to honour the intelligence of man. This was put there by God for some special purpose. It is meant to ask questions. A man in his quest wil ask questions. But only religious dictators will stand against this.
4. Is science right ?
I do not think so. Science for that matter is not fool proof. How many theories have we changed and discarded ? The same problem you can see in science which religion faces, that people opposing the truth. They are of the belief that their theories are right- a blind hope. So science can evolve, but religion can not , is this right ? Science without religion is utter rubbish and dangerous. Before harnessing the power of atoms for peaceful use, we used it for military use. No wonder all new scientific advances happen in military, for first to test against your brother. Still no answer for reason of life.......... more hypotheses ..........When you dissect a smile and make it a mix of muscles and hormones, you forget the beauty.
Moral
Keep religion and politics separate. Do not try to mix science and religion. Do not institutionalize religion and oppose changes. There may be a unified theory, which will incorporate all these, but still the world is not ready for it.
World is celebrating the theory of evolution, its 150 th year.
All religions have their stories of creation, so how will they handle this? Does it tell that their faith is wrong, or can they accept the theory of evolution and still keep their faith.
Based on this, a TV presenator was questioning a religious person about the changes happening in religion. The question was based on the changes made in religion to accept discoveries that science bring forward. He was on the assumption that religion drastically reinvents themselves to be on par with scientific advance.
The questions he raised also made me think some points.
1. Do religions reinvent themselves ?
Yes, they do. They try to incorporate changes in society and technology into them.
2. Is this right?
Yes. They have to. If it is to keep up the moral aspect of people, it has to address the modern issues. When you live in a world of internet, you can not talk in terms of early civilization customs. But when this happens, be sure to do it in a proper way that does not turn up absurd. But the problem here is people can believe you are controlled by machines in a matrix, cloned by extra terrestials, but disbelieve that God created you. But why ? This is because we some times present before them things which can not be scientifically correct, and the reluctance to change when proved wrong. Rememeber the earth-centric theory.
3.Why this happens?
This may be because of the authorities and politics that enter religion. When religion moves away from real faith , and moves into a power struggle the world suffers, also the followers. Religions based on almost same faiths fight against each other. I have seen Indians and Pakistanis so friendly outside Asia. But the politicians want to keep them against each other so that they have a topic they can turn always to win elections. Is the same true in case of religious leaders ? Remember a leader who used to do the Moses stuff lately quoting words from God. I think the reluctance to change in religion comes from power struggles and unhealthy politics. Noway you can justify when you bless and send people to die. It is your brother against whom you are going to fight against. So it is unquestioning faith that is asked for here. But the unquestioning faith which should be directed towards God is demanded by mortal men. It is as good as keeping people illetrate. Religion has to honour the intelligence of man. This was put there by God for some special purpose. It is meant to ask questions. A man in his quest wil ask questions. But only religious dictators will stand against this.
4. Is science right ?
I do not think so. Science for that matter is not fool proof. How many theories have we changed and discarded ? The same problem you can see in science which religion faces, that people opposing the truth. They are of the belief that their theories are right- a blind hope. So science can evolve, but religion can not , is this right ? Science without religion is utter rubbish and dangerous. Before harnessing the power of atoms for peaceful use, we used it for military use. No wonder all new scientific advances happen in military, for first to test against your brother. Still no answer for reason of life.......... more hypotheses ..........When you dissect a smile and make it a mix of muscles and hormones, you forget the beauty.
Moral
Keep religion and politics separate. Do not try to mix science and religion. Do not institutionalize religion and oppose changes. There may be a unified theory, which will incorporate all these, but still the world is not ready for it.
Wednesday 4 March 2009
Why am I here ?
Always wanted to use time effectively. But after 5 years of software engineering, it all looks the same. Do not have the genius or flare in me to leave a mark behind. May be had some good solutions, but can it be credited to me ? Definitely no.
It was with the help of google I was coding. The better you can search, the better programmer you are. Ya, you need to know what you are looking for.
So where was I ? Ya about leaving a mark behind. Always wanted to be something original. Still in the search for it. But I know, it is still a distant dream.
Got fed up with Indian software industry. The daily politics and craze for positions.
Everyone forgets that God created the 'CODE' first. He saw it was beautiful too.
Then whoever did not have the aptitude to code or did not want to code invented everything around it. QA, Management, HR .................... at last the programmer was sacrificed.
At least there was an advantage. You made quick bucks. You could hope around, always for a better offer. Everyone was wanting to become a software engineer. Now that also has changed. Everyone had forgot about the cyclic nature of the industry. The dreams are coming crashing down. We made the 'city of flowers', the most worst place to live in. Made the living expense high with our quick earned money. Now what ? Software industry is coming down. But expenses, will they come down.
Had seen a lof of 'engineers' working on stocks and real-estate in office. Wonder what they are doing now ?
Hmmmmmmmmmm.......... onsite opportunity .... if you are lucky. Again it is not a mass onsite like before. You may end up in Norway alone seeing no-one. with no sun light too.
May be a direct job abroad. That also looks bleak now. Unemployment is a problem for them too. If they can not find jobs for them selves how will they give it to you ?
Lucky are those who were befor us. Are they really ? How much they missed. Technology, sophistication and comfort have always favoured the late comers. So who is lucky ?
Ha ha ha............. Hey is this all very important? There are so many things I had missed. Now is the time to return to them. More important things.
This will all clear up. Wait for the next cycle. Take it as a reality check. At least this will keep away people away from software, who just comes here because of pressure. Let us also find alternare industries. Otherwise it will be a huge mistake. It is just till another nation picks up English and starts to offer cheaper labour.
Just wanted to write some thing, some things that were in my mind. So here I am .....................
It was with the help of google I was coding. The better you can search, the better programmer you are. Ya, you need to know what you are looking for.
So where was I ? Ya about leaving a mark behind. Always wanted to be something original. Still in the search for it. But I know, it is still a distant dream.
Got fed up with Indian software industry. The daily politics and craze for positions.
Everyone forgets that God created the 'CODE' first. He saw it was beautiful too.
Then whoever did not have the aptitude to code or did not want to code invented everything around it. QA, Management, HR .................... at last the programmer was sacrificed.
At least there was an advantage. You made quick bucks. You could hope around, always for a better offer. Everyone was wanting to become a software engineer. Now that also has changed. Everyone had forgot about the cyclic nature of the industry. The dreams are coming crashing down. We made the 'city of flowers', the most worst place to live in. Made the living expense high with our quick earned money. Now what ? Software industry is coming down. But expenses, will they come down.
Had seen a lof of 'engineers' working on stocks and real-estate in office. Wonder what they are doing now ?
Hmmmmmmmmmm.......... onsite opportunity .... if you are lucky. Again it is not a mass onsite like before. You may end up in Norway alone seeing no-one. with no sun light too.
May be a direct job abroad. That also looks bleak now. Unemployment is a problem for them too. If they can not find jobs for them selves how will they give it to you ?
Lucky are those who were befor us. Are they really ? How much they missed. Technology, sophistication and comfort have always favoured the late comers. So who is lucky ?
Ha ha ha............. Hey is this all very important? There are so many things I had missed. Now is the time to return to them. More important things.
This will all clear up. Wait for the next cycle. Take it as a reality check. At least this will keep away people away from software, who just comes here because of pressure. Let us also find alternare industries. Otherwise it will be a huge mistake. It is just till another nation picks up English and starts to offer cheaper labour.
Just wanted to write some thing, some things that were in my mind. So here I am .....................
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